Not even one week has passed
since I saw you last,
and I miss you.
Already.

And I might have felt bad about that had
the last time I saw you had not been
the last time I would see you
for awhile.

In that (not even) one week span
I have seen the next 6 months,
and it feels like I have spent an eternity
preemptively missing you.

Preemptively missing you

I don’t think soul mates exist.
I don’t think there’s only one person for everyone.
But I don’t think I’ll ever love someone as much as I loved you.
I don’t think there’s room for someone else in my heart considering you never left it.
If only I couldn’t think.
My thoughts are what ruin me.

Thanks to you,
I can no longer regard her as “my friend”.
She will forever be branded “your girlfriend” in my mind,
even though you two aren’t even together anymore.
She’ll always be the one who hurt me,
because I can’t bear to place the blame where it belongs -
on you and me.

Labels (Alt. Title: Much Ado About Nothing)

"I like her too much to ever date her".
(We both know you’ll date her anyways.)
“I’m glad you and I never dated too”.
(I’m angry that we never got the chance.)
“I’m not a cynic, I swear”.
(Yes, yes you are. And I totally love it.)

These are the lies he tells me,
the truths I keep to myself.
I hate that he lies to me,
But lies of omission are lies too.
The worst lie of all, though,
the one we constantly feed to each other is
“We don’t lie to each other.”

The Lies We Tell

Almost two years ago to date
I told you that I loved you,
And I did;
I still do.
But I also told you
what a shame it was
that we didn’t have the chance
to fall in love.
But I lied.
Or maybe I believed it
at the time.
It took me two years,
but now I know:
I never stopped falling in love with you.
Every time I see you,
I fall for you all over again.

Fall for you

I started writing him a long love letter today. It’s one I’ll never send. It’s written in a journal that I plan to continuously update as I think of everything that could possibly explain everything I feel for him and why I know now that I made the wrong decision two years ago. Maybe one day, if we actually are lucky enough to end up together despite it all, I’ll give it to him.

I think I’ve known for awhile
But I never let myself entertain the thought.
Then she asked me, “Do you still like him?”
And I heard myself say, “I will always love him.”

You’re My Always
"We don’t lie to each other."

"We don’t lie to each other."

Just You, Leave Out All the Rest

Just You, Leave Out All the Rest